WHAT EXACTLY IS THIS PHENOMENON CALLED LOVE

Each one of us has his or her own theory based on personal experience and knowledge of others. I have my own and it is this……

The basic cause which makes us seek the love of another person is because we are extremely lovely. “Void inner loneliness’”. “Inner solitude” the feeling of being all alone in the world. At times we feel this solitude with great poignancy and it is almost like physical pain. It can come upon us suddenly and without warming-as in the early hours of the morning. It can be brought on by the wail of a locomotive as it speeds through the black of the night not knowing where it has come from or where it is going; it may be brought on by the sight of a heron just one in a vast sky at dusk.

Thus inner solitude is something of a paradox. At one time it is like as acting void begging to be filled by the warmth of affection of another, at others, it becomes a walled fortress with a notice bearing the warning “keep out” what happens when two people meet can be best illustrated by depicting humans beings as a series of concentric circles one inside the other. The innermost circle may be described as the circle of inner solitude. When two people meet and happen to like each other, they invite each other to trespass towards this innermost circle, to share this inner loneliness. The two oats of concentric circle begin to overlap.

In actual life invitation to trespass is expressed in exposure- baring of oneself-emotionally and physically’ love desires that its secret be revealed, said Rumi “ if a mirror reflects nothing what use is it? The ideal equation is, of course, when the two sets of circles completely overlap, when the integration between two human beings is emotionally and physically complete. The ideal equation seldom takes place as in the process of getting to know each other (trespassing towards each others inner solitudes) conflicts may arise. One, may not like the others political or religious views, one may be liked by the others mannerisms, dress, body color, halitosis- just anything. Then there arises the desire to preserve one’s inner solitude and the people concerned begin to put up there defenses with the notice. “Thus far but no further” they may even expel the intruder outwards. To the extent to which a person allows another to trespass towards his or her inner solitude to that extent he or she emotionally involved or in love with other. There is no such thing as total all consuming love. We are in different stages of love with different people.

Whatever its limitation, whatever, whatever its frustrations, love is the greatest the most exhilarating experience of life. The heart which is exempt from sickness of love is not a heart; the body deprived of the grief of love is only lemon and water. It is amorous disquietude which gives to the universe its eternal movement. It is the dizziness of love which makes the spheres turn around.

Tell me where is fancy bred,

Or in the heart or in the head

 Reply Reply

It is engendered in the eyes,

With gazing fed. And fancy dies.

In the cradle where it lies

                                          SHAKESPEARE

Hota hai raaz-i-ishq-omohabbat inhi se paash

 Aankhein Zubaa nahin hai,magar bezubaa nahi

 (‘The secrets of desire and love are revealed by the eyes.

 Eyes have no tongue but they are not without speech”)

The earliest symptom of being infected by the love bug is to have a compulsive desire to keep repeating the beloved’s name.

Make me a wallow cabin at your gate,

And call upon my social with in the house;

And sing them loud even in the deed of night;

Holler your name to the reverberate hills,

And make the babbling gossip of the air.

Cry out, “Olivia”

Next to drooling over the name of the beloved comes the desire to praise her looks.

“She walks in beauty, like the night

Of cloudless climes and starry skies

And all that’s best of dark and bright

Meet in her aspect and her eyes”

“Oh thou art fairer than the evening air

Clad in the beauty of a thousand stars”

When in love you cannot think of anything expect the beloved. It becomes as obsession and you cannot concentrate on your work but keep playing. “He loves me, he loves me not”.

It is rare to find people who fall in love only once in their lifetime and not only give-up when “death does them apart” most of them are forever falling in love with other people and hoping that the new involvement would prove them rewarding than the last. To wit Omar Khayyam’s lines which married people could quote when engaged in extra martial love affair.

“O love if thou and I could with fate conspire

To change this sorry state of things entire;

Would we not shatter is to bits

And remold it nearer to our hearts desire?

“And if existence will molest a man with

beauty, how can he help?

Trying to impose on her the boundary

Of his two bare arms.

“What is deep, as love is deep, “I’ll have

Deeply. What is good, as I’ll have well”

Traditionally all men are seekers, women are sought.

“Escape me? Never

Beloved!

While I am I, and you are you,

So long as the world contains us both

While the one eludes,

Must the other peruse.”

Jaisey Naseem, har Saher, Teyree Hee Karoon Hoo justajoo

Kahn-bd-khaana, Dar-ba-dar, Shar-ba-shahr koo-ba-koo.

“Like the breeze every morning

I go looking for you.

From house to house, door to door

City to City, lane to lane.

Sab kuch khuda se mang liya

Tujh ko maang kar

Uthtey nahi hai haath

Mere is dua ke baad

“I asked all I could ask for

When I asked for you

Once my prayer was answered

I did not raise hands in prayer again”

Mujhe Sahel Ho gayi manzilen

Yeh hawa ke rukh badal gaye

Tera hath hath me aa gaya

Ke chiraag raah me jal gaye

“When your hand I took in mine

Lamps along the route burnt bright

Winds changed course to ease my way

My goal appeared in easy sight”

Vojo hummen tum mein qarar tha

Tumhen yaad hoke na yaad ho

Vahee yaanee vada nibah ker

Tumhe yaad ho ken a yaad ho.

“The pledge that you and I made together

You may remember or may have forgot

The vow to remain, true to each other

You may remember or may have forget”

Vo jo lutf mujpe the peyshetar

Vo karam ke thha mere haal par

Mujhe sab hai yaad zara zara

Tumhe yaad ho ken e yaad ho

“The love that you had for me sometime ago,

The concern you had for my lot,

I remember some of it,

You may remember it or may have forget”

For the world, love is nothing more than a carnal appetite, a vague inclination which indulgence sates and absence destroys. Bear in mind that nothing should be carried to extremes. I am not claiming that our bodies are of no importance in the greatest of the bonds. Without physical intimacy there could never be any intimacy of the soul; because two beings must love one another must to some extent share their thoughts and their deeds. This is one of the reasons why he has created the attraction of one sex for the other, which is the only indication of the divinity of marriage.

Blow wind to where my loved one is.

Touch her, and come and touch me soon;

I will feel her gentle touch through you,

And meet her beauty in the moon

These things are much for one who loves

A man can live by them alone

That she and I breathe the same air

And that the earth we tread is one”

“The clear bright flame of man’s discernment dies

When a girl clouds it with her lamp black eyes”

“Her face is not the moon, nor are her eyes

Twin lotuses, nor are her arms pure gold;

She is flesh and bone. What lies the poets told!

Ah but we love her, we believe the lies”

“If the forest of her hair

Calls you to explore the land

And her breasts, those mountain fair

Tempt that mountaineer your hand

Stop! Before it is too late

Love the brigand lies in wait

The road is rough and oh the moon is bright

Suppose my husband should discover

People may talk- But can I bear to night

To disappoint my lover?

And so she walked a step or two then

Turned and Came back again”

Where are you going in the dead of the night?

To meet my love who is life and death to me.

And are you not afraid to walk alone?

How can to be alone? Love keeps me company

“Thunder clouds, I think you are wicked

You know I’m going to meet my own lover

And yet you first scare me with my thunder

And how you are trying to caress me

With your rain hands”

The lamps were lit and the night spent,

And he, my love was on love intent

And he knew full well just what loving meant

But he made his love in a cautious way

For the wretched bed upon which he lay

Creaked and had far too much to say”