Sunday, November 3, 2013

Interesting Definitions



School   - A place where Papa pays and son plays
Life Insurance   - A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die rich
Nurse   - A person who wakes up to give you sleeping pills
Love affair   - Something like the game of cricket where one day International are more popular than a five days test match
Marriage   - It’s an agreement in which   a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.
Divorce - Future tense of marriage
Tears-   The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine water proof
Lecture  -  An art of  transforming  information  from the  notes  of the  lecturer  to the  notes of the students  without  passing the rough  “ minds of either”
Conference   - The confusion of one man multiplied by the member present
Compromise - The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
Dictionary   - A place where success comes before work
Conference Room   A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on
Classic -   Books which people praise but don’t read
Smile - A curve that can set a lot of things straight 
Office   - A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life
Yawn -The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth
Fate - A sign to make others believe that you know   more than you actually do
Committee   - Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together
Experience - The name men give to their mistakes
Atom Bomb   - An invention to end all inventions
Philosopher -   A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead
Diplomat   - A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip
Opportunist -- A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river
Optimist   -  A person who  while falling  from  Eiffel  tower  says  in midway  “ see  I am  not  injured yet”
Miser - A person who lives poor so that he   can die rich
Father -   A banker provided by nature
Criminal - A guy no different from the rest except that he got caught
Boss  -  Someone  who is  early  when you are  late  and late  when  you are  early
Politician-   One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.
Doctor - A person who kills your ills by pills and kills you by bills.

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